17th May 2003
Rick Bruner Is Fat and Runs Like a Girl
So, after writing the post below, I went for a run, in part because I’m fat (really), but also to shake my gloom and clear my head. Here’s what I came up with:
Please insult me. It’s for my own good.
At first, I thought maybe I could make myself feel better writing something like “Nick Denton is fat and runs like a girl,” to demonstrate that it really wasn’t so mean what I did, as I figure Nick can take a joke, and besides, he was the one who had the New York Times reporter call me for the story (see below). But somehow that just doesn’t do it. Then I realized what was missing is that I really didn’t know how my friend felt at seeing my insult about him in print. If I was really going to have some perspective on how he felt, the shoe needs to be on the other foot.
Of course, this is going to do nothing to redeem myself in my aggrieved friend’s eyes — in fact, it may well just make him madder, as I’m apparently flipping the whole ordeal into blog stunt for myself. But this is no longer about him, it’s about me. (Oh, who am I kidding? I’m a blogger: it’s always been about me.)
So I humbly request that if you have a blog, please, let me have it. Ruin my name on Google forever. Slashdot me, Instapundit me, get “Rick Bruner is fat and runs like a girl” on Daypop and Blogdex. Here are some ideas to get you started:
- Rick Bruner is a jackass with a fifth-grade sense of humor.
- Rick Bruner is stupid.
- Rick Bruner is ugly and his mother dresses him funny.
- With a friend like Rick Bruner, who needs enemies?
- Rick Bruner can’t sing.
- Rick Bruner is a shit stirrer who doesn’t know when enough is enough.
- Rick Bruner represents everything that is wrong with blogging.
- Rick Bruner is an object lesson for the rest of you.
You get the idea. Feel free to use any of these, or better yet, invent your own cruel insults. The truer the better. Spare me nothing. Then email me or leave a comment here so I know exactly how you feel.
I’m feeling better already.
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